Sacrament prayer

 Oh god
The eternal father

You cried last night
While we talked on the
phone
When I told you
I didn't want to be alive
anymore
I felt your holy spirit
Tickle my eardrum

And you sent your
Only begotten love
To be crucified
On the off-white carpet
Of my living room

Sent your only daughter
To save me
And I betrayed her

Conjured a shadow
to swallow her light
Chew up her spirit
And spent the night
Sucking on the rind
of your holy empathy

The hangover this
morning
Was deeper, stronger
Heavier than usual
It stretched to the heavens
And tasted like spilt
blood
And whiskey from every 
pore

Oh god
The immortal mother

I am guilt-ridden and
grateful
For her midnight
atonement
For her sadness
And my father's before mine